THAT PICTURE IS OUR DAD.  HE LOVES TO SKI AND HE LOVES US TOO.  THAT IS WHY WE GOT ON MOM'S COMPUTER AND WROTE HIM THE FOLLOWING LETTER INSTEAD OF A CARD FOR FATHER'S DAY.

DEAR DAD,

WE WANT TO THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A GOOD DAD TO US.  WE ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE YOU TO CLEAN OUT OUR LITTER BOX WHEN YOU ARE HOME.  WE KNOW YOU REALLY LOVE BUDDY BEE MORE THAN YOU LOVE US BECAUSE THAT PRICK TELLS US THAT ALL THE TIME.

DAD, WE ALL LOVE YOU AND WANT YOU TO KNOW HOW SPECIAL YOU ARE TO US TOO.  DAD, COULD YOU JUST RUB US AS MUCH AS YOU RUB THAT SUCK UP FURBALL BUDDY BEE?

DAD, WE LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS BUDDY BEE DOES.

DAD, BUDDY BEE ISN'T EVEN HERE WITH US, HE IS REALLY A SCHMUCK AND HE ALWAYS TEASES US THAT HE IS YOUR FAVORITE. 

DAD, WE LOVE WHEN YOU "WHINE" OUR NAMES ALL DAY WHEN YOU ARE HOME, BUT COULD YOU PLEASE LOWER YOUR VOICE BECAUSE AT TIMES YOU REALLY PISS US OFF ........ESPECIALLY WHEN WE TRY TO SLEEP.  O.K. HERE, WE DO ADMIT THAT WE USUALLY ALWAYS SLEEP BUT THAT IS BECAUSE YOU DON'T PLAY WITH US......ONLY WITH BUDDY.

YOU ARE OUR DAD TO AND WE LOVE YOU.  HAPPY FATHER'S DAY DAD.

DAD, YES WE ALL LOVE. 

 "BUDDY, GET YOU BUTT OVER HERE AND READ THIS, YOU SUCK YOU LITTLE PRICK.  THIS IS SUPPOSE TO BE FROM ALL OF US.  I AM TELLING DAD ON YOU BUDDY.  WE KNOW THAT DAD LOVES US TO.  I AM GOING TO TELL DADDY THAT YOU ARE NOT TELLING THE TRUTH TO US AND THAT DADDY IS NOT GOING TO SHIP OUR BUTTS OUT TO A SCIENCE LAB TO HAVE TESTS DONE ON US IF WE DON'T LISTEN TO YOU ANYMORE."

ANYWAY, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY DAD.

THE CREW, BUT NOT REALLY BUDDY.

This year the cat's wanted a Memorial Day picnic for all their friends so I checked with my hubby and he said "why not"?  The furballs have been so good lately so let them have some fun.







I told the critters that Daddy said O.K. but that they had to do the grilling and I would help them and get all the food.

My furballs were so thrilled that Buddy threw up a hairball and Sweetie said she will do all the grilling.  They all jumped on the sofa to discuss what would be good for their picnic.  After about l0 minutes of meowing, hissing and swatting each other, they finally came to an agreement that they all could live with. 

They all wanted FISH!  "What kind" I asked.  "A REAL WHOLE FISH" they answered in unison.  O.K. I will go down to the fairgrounds farmers market and see what whole fish they have, next, however, I will have to know exactly how many hairballs you are going to invite so I know how much fish to buy.

My crew scampered back to the sofa with a pen and pad of paper to decide who to invite.  After five minutes Buddy ran into the kitchen to ask me if there was a "limit" of how many of their friends could come.  I told him "no limit" as I gave my loving furball a scratch and a kiss.  After all, there aren't that many cats in the neighborhood; it couldn't be more than 10 that I know of.

About two hours later I went back to the den to check on them and it was such an adorable sight to see -- my babies were all curled up sleeping on the sofa together.  The list was laying on the coffee table so I picked it up and almost had a freaking hairball myself.  There must have been about 75 names on that list!  Most of them I never even heard of before -- and let me tell you that I feed a lot of strays here.

I glanced back at my perfect hairballs curled up together and my heart just melted.  How could I say "NO" to them now, after I promised them?

THEN I turned the list over and knew it would be very easy for me to have the freaking hairballs trim their list!

Those ungratefull little maggots also wrote an extended list and more menu items complete with notations.  Like, SHRIMP for mom to make with catnip for our picnic - just like she makes for us as a special treat.

Fresh catnip mixed in with oat grass for our salad to go with all the fish.

SPECIAL NOTE HERE:  Under that they wrote it would really impress those other "butt sniffing" schmucks if they had that too!

It was then that I decided not to "break the bank" for butt sniffing schmucks that they hardly knew and wanted to impress.  I just left them sleep and when they woke up later "smelling dinner" I told them to cut that list down to personal friends and not every stray that got knocked up outside with her kids and grandkids are not invited.They rallied together to moan and groan, but I did not give in.

Told my schmucks that they had 2 choices to make.  #1 have the picnic and I would do the shrimp with catnip, whole fish for gilling salad of oats and more catnip, etc if they wanted to treat their very best friends.

#2  I WOULD JUST BUY MAJOR CHEEP BAGS OF CAT FOOD AND TROUGHS FOR EVERY ONE ON THE LIST TO EAT OUT OF.  BY THE WAY YOU GUYS HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO DECIDE!

YES, I AM ONE SMART MOM. THE PICTURE EXPLAINS THEIR CHOICE.

copyright 2008, Cathy Gregor

My hairballs have been working on me for months and finally changed my mind for who will be the next BEST President.

Sweetie showed me the picture of her Uncle who served his whole life in the military and knows exactly what goes on behind the scenes to drag our nation into war. 

I was a Republican and always voted that way, however, after the cats enlightened me I changed my party to vote Democrate in the Pennsylvania Primary. 

Yes, my cats are proud because I voted for Obama.

Obama reminds me so much of President Kennedy who brought this country together in my youth to make a change.  He brought hope for change.

After 8 years of the Clinton lies, schemes and bullying, I agree with my hairballs that Obama IS THE RIGHT CHOICE FOR CHANGE.

Please give him a chance, our animals are smarter and wiser than we are!

The sun is shining and it is a crisp beautiful day!  The perfect type of day for Buddy to do the outside windows for me while I clean the inside windows.  I have learned that you can accomplish a lot more when you "delegate" the work for others to help.

Of course, you must all know by now that I only "delegate" with my hairballs when they do something bad and I have to punish them.

My cats, have taught me that to "punish" them is BAD and they will not cooperate but totally screw up whatever I tell them to do. 

 Therefore, I had to change my tactics and now "SELECT" the freaking hairball to help mom.  I am so brillant because the little fucker I pick who was naughty thinks that he/she is so good and special to be picked.

So today Buddy is mom's "SPECIAL" helper to clean the windows.  I didn't mention to him it was because he carved up the Easter ham like a freaking samurai warrior on crack when our backs were turned. 

Buddy actually thinks he got off without a hitch and that mom loves him so much that she chose his furry little butt out of all them jumping up and down raising their paws to help mom today.

I do have to admit he did an excellent job so I had to attach the picture I took of him working his furry tail off. 

Dozer and Sweetie also wanted to do the windows to help Buddy but I told them that the next time they can have their turn (if they are as good as Buddy).  Heck, I am on to something here, I should teach them how to use the vacuum. 

Heck, after the past storms here a few trees came down with the high winds and I could use some help with the chain saw.  On second thought, that would not be a good idea.

I do know one thing for sure; if my hairballs ever read this blog, I am "dead meat"!

Cathy Gregor, 2008

All my guys got all dressed up for Easter and walked in the parade and they looked so freaking cute.  Got home and I made an awesome honey cured ham for dinner and they chowed down so much ham I thought they would explode. 

Unfortunately, I left the rest of the ham on the counter to cut up for some split pea soup and sandwitches during the week; but Buddy chew most of it up when I turned my back.  He had the carving knife in his paws whacking away while chucking pieces of ham down for the other furballs to gobble up and when I finally caught him in the act he looked like a chipmunk with his cheeks filled with ham!

The other furballs ran like hell, but Buddy just smirked at me while holding the carving knife as if to say "bring it on mom - I'm not done yet".  Well, my reply said "get your furry butt off the counter and drop that knife if you don't want to loose all your nine lives". 

Buddy jumped down after stabing the ham with the knife.  That was when I caught him and gave him a spanking.  I told him that his punichment is to clean my windows when I start spring cleaning next week.

He meowed and puffed up telling me that "real men" don't do windows, I puffed up even larger and told that hairball that he is not a "real man" he is neutered and he will do what I tell him.

I sent him to his room to think about what he had done and if I got any more back meows from him I would wash his mouth out with soap. 

Halfway down the hallway to his room I saw Buddy out of the corner of my eye turning around and giving me the "finger".  I just left him go.

I will have my revenge next week when he has to clean my windows!  Plus I will take a picture of it for my blog!

Hope everyone had a Blessed Easter.

Cathy Gregor 2008